let me share sth

This are a few things about me,.....

You Are a Little Addicted to Gossip

In your view, most gossip is pretty harmless. And it's a pretty fun way to pass the time! You're willing to pass on some juicy details... As long as you're not impacting anyone's personal life too deeply.

Are You Addicted to Gossip?

What Gemin Means

G is for Gifted E is for Entertaining M is for Magnificent I is for Industrious N is for Neat

What Does Your Name Mean?

burdened?

I had a sleepless night yesterday. I don;t know what happened....Is it that I'm worrying myself too much? I seriously have no idea. Who ca help me solve these problems? Actually there was somebody that could help me indirectly but now...I can only pray that I will be able to have a peace of mind...My brain seem to weigh a thousand tons on me since yesterday. Is something bad going to happen to me? I seriously hope not....I am just panting for breadth this two days? { I'm not suffering from asthma} I'm suffering in that strangled feeling....Somebody RESCUE me!!! Thank goodness that when I'm around my friends, they are able to help me reduce a little of my weight....THanks JTM!!

My piano can be the reliver at times but it can also be the burden adder. I can only rely on myself to break through what seems to be binding me....I had support indirectly but it is now gone....maybe I should construcy a poem as my litreture lessons are on poems now...yea tlaking about lessons....school was fun today...had so many free periods...damn the stupid asshole, thinks it/she/he is so great.....call that person go do research, that person ended up bragging about something unrelated at all .Yea, and the bad neews is, I've got CCA tomorrow
and there is more of this kind of people around.....Good news is, I have got that instrument needed for my CCA....but it's not tuned yet.


The who i liked once so nice and kind,
till one day who went blind.....
who fell into the devil's trap,
Never to be seen anymore talking CRAP.

The who i liked disappeared from sight,
never ever seen in broad daylight.
It was as if who was air,
disappearing without a trace...

I have given up all hopes of finding who,
for I know te who will not be who I knew....

If you understand this poem I created, good for you... If you don't then don't especially if you think you are the "who"....

once again I lean for support
against my friends, weak and sullen.....

note to JTM: If I suddenly very quiet this few days,
dont bother bout me, cause I'm DEAD
and dead people have no feelings.....

school reopen

Just went to the gym and am now sweating like rain pouring down...It seems like I can't do without the gym in my life...well I go to the gym to keep fit...haha...anyways I'm tired....lalalas...I have my favourite dish for dinner....love it mans....

Btw, taiwan I hope you survive the band practice cause I don wanna lose you... :) haha...irina tooo....And for jer...tomorrow have MSP lalalas, then you have caligraphy ( Is it spelled this way? I can't be bothered to check the dictionary) Mel too...haiz, tomorrow we all have to stay back...sianzzz....

Today have 1 hour free period!!! So happy sia...started being engross in a chinese book...surprised? Anyway, this storybook aroused emotions in me so I liked it...but mostly it's pity for the characters...people...why must they suffer??? I just can't understand...But one stupid asshole spoiled the fun atmosphere by acting as if he's the chairman of the class when he is just one piece of irritating something..." punish you all" blabla...who do you think you are...you are the same age as me...what authority do you have to control us? I can be submissive to authourity but I seriously ain't going to submit to you....

the sunset is the breaking of dawn,
the moon rise is the start of night.

last day of hols

I guess this is going to be the last post before school reopens again...yeah...school is going to reopen...that is what? A good or a bad thing? To me, it is a half-bad, half-good thing....duhhh...

So one month of relaxing is going to end in 2 days time and a stretching long time of school day pressure is going to come on again...and during those times i won't be on the web for as much as i am during the hols...how much i hope our country have the 4 seasons...i love the "fall" so much....maybe winter is too cold...

Yea...mood is not so happy now. Got to memorise new pieces for the CCA AGAIN!!! this is so infuriating...after one comes another...I'm wondering if i have chosen the wrong CCA in the first place...haiz...life is always full of regrets...
How i wish time would be able to stop a my command then I would always have so much time to do whatever things i need to do...thank goodness this 2 days, my instrutor was not in a bad mood so she didn't really scold me that much as i had expected myself to have gotten....

Was chatting on msn before posting...chatted with two love enemies and in the end i left the conversation...they were getting TOO vulgar and i could not stand it....anyway, i think they already don't see each other eye to eye even before they became love enemies...told them to stop their foul language but they did not listen...then in the end, they end up blocking one another...very childish right? Like that also must argue...some more it's like already 6 months gone...in different school also...one in boys school, one in mixed...haiz...I rather have more friends then enemies...how i wish i had more good friends online at that time...i appearing offline now before talking to someone whom i feel like talking too...

Yaaa...so the next post from this may be a long-long time.....

once upon a time in a far-far-far away land.........

yay

Phew...it's finally resolved and it is like one heavy load off my mind...can caoncentrate on the other heavy loads already...hahaha...IT'S FINALLY SOLVED!!!

BAd thing is, the holidays are gonna end...how bad can this be...how i wished we had two months holidays during the mid and end-of-year....although it may be a bit too long??Have got to go back to school tomorrow for the damn CCA again and i tell you i'm sure gonna get a earful from the trainer cause i didn't memorise the scores when i was supposed to hahaz...expected huh? Lazy gurl...
Anyway, what she told us to memorise was like riduculous?? 20 pieces?? Crazy or what??

Another big event coming up for me is my piano exams...16 july and it's llike less then one month away?? How good this is?? Anyway, i'm very very VERY happy that the whole episode is solved...hmm....yea, it's time to change myself too...lalalas...remain happy forever!!!

Oh yea, tomorrow going out with friends but actually not going out larz, is go do project...can JTM tell me how to go to compasspoint from our school?? I seriously have no idea how to get there...I never go there before...hahaz...lalalalalalala

when the mist in front of you have cleared,
you will see a ray of light...

sorry

SORRY to everyone, especially JMJ...relly sorry for all this trouble...I guess i'm the real culprit behind everything really sorry...there's nothing else to do except apologise,,,

music

Went onto some website today and found many piano pieces for chinese pop songs. some I can catch the notes but others I can't so I ended up with some half songs. Don't be mistaken, this post is really written at 8am. I just woke up early today. Yea, no idea why.

I hope the whole crazy episode will come to an end soon. I dont like to be tangled into one mess with me invovled in it and me probably as the cause of it. Hiaz, seems like we will have to take a long time to mend this broken bridge of ours. How long will it take? I hope not the whole year. Why?! did we even land here? Let's take off from here!! We have landed in a wrong place.

Yea, not so much to talk about today, can only say that the HEAVENLY holidays are ending!!!! :( Many of them feel that staying at home is so boring but I feel that being at home is so relax. So good sia, better than school so much pressure...

survey

I shall do the very first survey on my blog
I shan't include the writings on top...if you want more information go to www.jtmj1234.blogspot.com

1) If your friend betrayed you what would your reaction be?
I would blame myself for making friends with him or her...maybe if we made up, I will not trust her as before

2) If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?
I think it would be a world of peace and happiness

3) Have you ever confess to someone before?
No, I keep my feelings inside me, but I will tell some of my close friends, hoping they won't betray me

4) Are you hungry?
As in now, No. I'm never hungry in the morning

5) What is your ideal lover like?
Confidential/personal information?!

6) Which is more blessed? love someone or being loved by someone?
I think when the two parties love one another, It is the most blessed

7) How long are you willing to wait for someone you really love?
Depends on how much I love him/her

8) If the person you secretly like is attached, what would you do?
Just forget about him though it would be hard.

9) Is there anything that has made you happy?
Yes, lots

10) Is being in college fun?
Not sure

11) How do you see yourself in 10 years time?
Still myself? Perphas looking older? and as a working woman?

12) Who are currently the most important people to you?
no.1>family including cousins
no.2>friends who understand me

13) What do you think the person who had tag you is?
Just herself?

14) Do you believe in miracles?
Yes.

15) Would you rather be "rich and single" or "poor and married"?
Neither. I would rather be average with a happy family

16) What is the first thing you do every morning?
Er...wake up??

17) Would you give all in a relationship?
Initial stage, no. But at the later stage, maybe

18) If you found out your love is flirting behind your back,what would you do?
Give him a little time to change. If he can't change, forget it, break up.

19) What type of friend do you like?
Have the same thoughts as me, understand me

20) What type of friend do you dislike?
If I dislike that person, I wouldn't even be his/her friend in the first place...

pissed off

Did that survey before posting,

It's past one month since their visit...18th April 2008. One of the happiest day in my life. I miss them...why must they migrate??? Without them, it's like something is missing when we have a full family gathering...but maybe it won't have the same effect on me if they had lived in singapore the past few years?? Him/her in particular is the person I miss the most...Him/her was able to bring colors from the rainbow down to earth...

This is bad...why must time fly so fast? I hate it when i'm enjoying something and time flies past like nobody's business...haiz, my hoidays!!! Don't run away...forget it, I can't make time stop.

Another thing is...
My dear girl,
I wasn't talking about the project you thought I was talking about...You are right that I have no right to interfere in your affairs...ok, I take it as I'm a busybody...
Look, let me explain my behaviour,
I'm sorry if *** and you is caught between ### and me...but you know really, I didn't mean to put you all in this predicament...
But why must you, *** and ### avoid me like i'm some crazy person or something?? Why? I asked myself...the distance between as stretched apart over the last month...Why? Lack of communication...this is the one important ting that we are lagging. The thought that *** is snatching ### away from me NEVER ever crossed my mind, what made you think it did? The way I behave or the tone of my voice??

Did I ever take you for granted? I treat you all equally, maybe treat ### better the last time...but since she is gave me the cold shoulder, I treat all equally maybe *** a little better. Maybe, I talk things like ### is _______or_______ sometimes but is it worth mentioning?? Why bring up all those bad memories?? Surely those were true? Why not you judge them yourself?

And the thing about the random project thing is...why does the fault lies with me when you and *** quarrels??? Was I the cause of the quarrel, I hope not. I doubt I'm not even worthy to quarrel about. Why make it sound so awful???

IF WE WANNA BE FRIENDS AGAIN, WE NEED TO COMMUNICATE AND UNDERSTAND ONE ANOTHER'S THOUGHTS, BEHAVIOURS AND ACTIONS...Yea, that's what I concluded, if we aren't able to get together and forget past grudges...I seriously doubt we can ever be buddies again....with utmost greive, I post this...


Will the wandering souls beside me ever feel like me,
will the wandering souls ever understand me?
Will the wandering souls ever take a step forward into faith,
will the wandering souls ever exoerience like me?
Will the wandering souls I used to merge with stay with me,
or will they be blown away by the wind?
Will these unsettled souls ever rest in peace,
will they ever feel happy?

holidays flying past

Poor me...not enough holidays to spend lazing around, 2 weeks gone, this is now the 3rd week...have gotta go back for CCA practice next week and stil haven't memorise the music scores...damn, why am I so dis-orientated during the holidays, like that how catch up when school reopen? huh? blabla, whatever lah...have to continue catching up...

It's a funny feeling when you feel that you have mixed feelings, maybe this sentence is kinda weird but I dont wanna express it to its full meaning or it will be kinda obvious...how can one person live without worries, I wonder...if there is a woory-free person on this earth, this person must be so-so fortunate...but I guess it is impossible for people my age...

It was so inappropriate but they couldn't be bothered, what else is there left in this whole episode? Everything is either this or that and they seem unbothered even when it affects their marks...it's already for so long and they still aren't putting in a serious effort...maybe they do but it is spent on playing...can't they just be serious or something? Fine, maybe they need to play but seriously not when we are onto something important...maybe to them it's just some boring old thing but to me, I treat everything important, and I will surely do it to my best even if I don't feel like doing it...haiz, when will they wake up from dreamland and find the world in a dredful mess?

unless you are awake,
you will never see the suffering.

tired out

Went to the gym today...my legs numb le, ran at the speed of 9...then one lady came in and ask me how come i run so long, she say she want to use leh...so guo fen lor...see me xiao hai zi then bully me...what can i do? so i rang ge ta lor...one-of-a-kind here, nobody so guo fen before...Did the litreture homework today, quite tuff...my progress is slow...i guess this is the holidays so i'm in a lazy mood. I miss my cousin back in australia, i wonder how they are doing now...they planned to migrate there le :( wouldn't have so many times to see them again...can contact only through the web... :( haiz, people come and go...watched a drama serial today...a old mother was so lonely for a long time until she die...even when she was sick, her children didn't even bother and still said that only when their mum's condition is very bad then call them...what kind of children is this...i pity their mother...how can there be such heartless creatures in this world??? Ok, maybe the world still have loads of them but this is really unimaginable...doing this to own mother after all that she have done for you???!!! That's not what you should be doing in real life, man!!!

Another thing is I neever had guess SHE was ever in such a serious relationship with one of her ex-friends. My gosh!! I read his blog and I was seriously taken aback!! SHE, is that what really happened to you?? I never knew he was that SERIOUS...kays maybe one of the reason is because he is in the B-G-R stage...hmmm...but maybe he should be putting all this efforts on his studies instead since he knows that he is more "stupid" then you? I'm not saying he must convert into a nerd or something but it's really...it's...it's argh, never mind...to prevent offending him or you, I shall not speak...really, what is on the mind of people?? How I wish I could understand or Know what they are thinking...but I'm not God, how am I able to unless you tell me?!